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Monday, March 13, 2006

Starting the week on a humorous note...

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It has been a rather tumultuous end to the previous week. First, the you-know-what that happened you-know where on Friday you-know-when. Seeing the hit counter for this blog go thru the roof was pretty scary, albeit in a rather gratifying way. Tumultuous nevertheless. Then, early Monday morning, Liverpool had to lose to Arsenal in the most idiotic fashion.

So, it's time for Walski to delve into the ridiculous again, to regain some of that lost zest that the weekend has sapped out of me. Now, those of you expecting myAsylum to be a one-issue blog - sorry to disappoint you, 'cause it's not. I would have posted this earlier, but my Mondays are usually busy; and today was no different.

There's much, much more to life than to dwell on things that we can't change - not so quickly or easily change, anyway - it would just lead me to real, bona fide depression. So this post looks to other things, on the lighter side of life. Which I do from time to time when life gets me down.

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First thing, then, to report from the world of the bizarre is this website I came across called Yes folks, while we here in Malaysia ponder over whether or not Bigfoot exists in the depths of the Johor jungle, cow abductions is apparently a serious problem in rural America. This site is dedicated to making the public aware of this problem. The culprits? Why, aliens, of course. The space kind, and not the "illegal" kind like we have in Malaysia. Between the time I snagged the image above and I finish this sentence, 8 719 more cow abductions have been reported. Scary innit?

This site should appeal to the Bigfoot crowd. The site even has products to peddle, like this one.

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The Moonitor - a specialized CCTV product to ensure the safety of your herd from them nasty aliens. It can be found in the Products/Services of the site.

Closer to home, the other day I visited a new condo my friend just purchased somewhere in the Mount Kiara area. I won't mention exactly where; suffice it to say, this place does exist. Anyhow, after looking at his unit, we walked around the well-landscaped compound of the condo, when I spotted this sign:

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So, as long as you are not bomba, you may use the area for Fire Brigade access. I would not want to be around the area in case of a fire. But seriously, these developer folks should really pay attention to what they put on the signs - 'cause it may just confuse the hell out of our firemen!

If you ever wondered what kind of monster you were, based on your name, check out this site; it's The Monster Name Decoder. Walski, apparently, in monsterland, decodes to:

Wimp-Abducting, Livestock-Snatching Killer from the Isle

But be that as it may, Walski unreservedly denies any involvement, whatsoever, in the growing incidences of cow abductions.

After reading the posts that Siti Nurhaliza, Mawi and Akademi Fantasia are all proof that Malaysia suffers from mass delusion, I suddenly wondered what kind of monster Siti is. Siti Nurhaliza, or S. Nurhaliza ('cause it only allows 11 characters) apparently decodes to become:

Sinister, Nefarious Unkindness-Roused Hitchhiker-Abducting, Livestock-Injuring Zombie from the Abbey

Hmmm.. I wonder if Datuk K. knows...

This particular site has two sister sites, The Cyborg Name Decoder and The Sexy Name Decoder. Amuse your friends, and torment your enemies with their decoded names. So, I thought: Hmmmm, I wonder what Mawi decodes to? And since he is a (hrummph) heart throb to some... I tried the Sexy Name Decoder, and came up with this:

Man Administering Worship and Indulgence

Un-fickin-believable, but true... life is stranger than fiction sometimes...

And where, oh where, did I find these three sites, you may ask? Well, I'm sure everyone by now knows who Jeff Ooi is (eminent Malaysian blogger); well, apparently there is site that lampoons Jeff to-the-max. While Jeff's site is called Screenshots, the lampoon site is called Potshots. And it's run by someone called Daft Oi.

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Don't know much about Daft Oi, except that he/she is of the Francus Strongus variety. In other words, one of the Wombies. From Wombania - actually, a cartoon strip about genetically engineered wombats. Read all about them here. Some have lambasted Daft Oi for doing what he/she does - but I for one, find Potshots extremely hilarious.

And we live in a time where every little bit of humor counts towards making our lives a little bit happier. Humor, though, can sometimes be in bad taste, and admittedly Potshots does go there from time to time. But today is a world where humor in bad taste can lead to... well, does Jylland-Post sound familiar?

Be that as it may, for yours truly, humor keeps me going. Humor makes me look forward to the next day, knowing damn well that there are certain forces in the universe that would like nothing better than to pit us brother against sister against brother. To an end that can only be described as, bright and explosive.

Lifted from Chewy's blog. Image hosting by Photobucket

But if we learn to laugh at ourselves from time to time, and realize that we can never be above ridicule, especially when we do or say something ridiculous, then perhaps we can learn to live better neighbor to neigbor, and learn to look beyond how we are different in color of skin, different in what we believe to be the higher power, and learn to realize that we all bleed red. Unless you're this guy.

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And for this guy, no matter what special rights you think you do or should have, no matter how much or little you own, no matter what color skin you may identify yourself with - you're nothing but this guy's breakfast, lunch or dinner. Without the teh-tarik afterwards.