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Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Now Hiring: Agent Provocateurs

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Are you currently young, unemployed, disenfrenchised, bored or generally not very useful to society? Are you excited by FRU attacks - and would love to initiate one?

Image taken from Malaysiakini (subscription required), hosting by PhotobucketDo you enjoy the occassional fracas, fistfigt, and like to play with fire? Are you able to take the occassional light beating, particularly if it is for the sake of appearance?

Is your moral compass broken, permenantly pointing south, better yet, if you don't have one, or even better, don't know the meaning of moral compass?

Do you enjoy agitating large crowds, particularly in the presence of law enforcement?

If you answered YES to any one of these questions, you could be very well on your way towards a rewarding career as an agent provocateur!
(job description, benefits and how to apply, in the full post)

With election season just around the corner, your agnst and general rowdiness can be put to good use, by creating havoc and catalyze police brutality against the many undesirable organizations that are calling for a more accountable government, and are generally a threat to national political security of your potential masters.

Like those calling for free and fair elections. What an obominable concept! And we need you to ensure that the next elections are the best that money can buy!

And if you answered YES to all of the questions, you may just have the qualities we are looking for to start a career in politics! Academic qualifications are optional, but the ability to blindly follow instructions is required.

Plus, as an agent provocateur, you will receive the added benefit of:
choosing from an attractive selection of ribbons to identify yourself to law enforcement and fellow agent provocateurs
free medical (in case you get beaten up)
learning the skill of dodging magic bullets
free membership to your local neighborhood rempit social club (if you're not already a member)
be notorious in your community
be the best political patriot that you can be!

Interested? To apply, simply contact your local mat rempit social club, and state your interest. That's all it takes - from there, you don't need to contact us. We'll contact you!

Come join the many whom have sold their souls in the unending effort to ensure that any peaceful assembly turns violent, for the sake of political survival of the few, at the expense of the many. And maybe make some bucks while you're at it!

Walski's contextual footnote: In case you have been living under a coconut shell the past few days, context for today's post can be found at Malaysiakini (here, here and here - subscription required), and also at The People's Parliament, Eli' blog, and countless other blogs and sites that have reported and commented on the tragedy at Pantai Batu Burok, Terengganu.